Say Cheese

I  love cheese.  However, my love for cheese does have its limits.  While I go crazy over a well designed cheese plate (even more so when accompanied with charcuterie), I do have a hard time trying not to gag when I'm in a cheese store..... you know those stores that have all sorts of stinky cheeses.  Cheese in bulk make me want to vomit, but cheese in serving size is a delight.

While knowing it could end in disaster, or even worse, turn me off to cheese forever, I decided to try and make mozzarella.  The least offensive cheese I could think off..... after all, it's just milk..... 

Let me begin by saying that simplicity of the ingredients is super misleading.  The process is harder than I thought it would be......

Citric acid is probably one of the most common ingredient ever.  It's in everything.  Pretty much all my favorite candies and food (pepperoni) contain citric acid.  It's also in lotions, bath salts, and all sorts of shit you use everyday.... however, it took me a while to find the damn thing.  

Anyway - so I made mozzarella.... I dry heaved a few times because 'cooking milk' started to smell like baby vomit.  Not pleasant.  

I also had fantasies of stretching cheese during the shaping and handling.  Nope, you're trying to control crumbling curds and basically kneading it till starts to form into the stretchy cheese you think it should be.  

I have no idea what Rennet is but it goes into cheese

Curds forming - this is when i started to gag and dry heave

Final product - Two big balls of mozzarella..... 

I think my friend Black Shannon was right when she asked why anyone would make cheese if they didn't have to.  Especially since I literally live above a Whole Foods.  But I wanted to try it.  I tried.  And I have concluded that I will leave it up to the professional cheese makers.  

For now, these balls are sitting comfortably in my fridge while I recover.  Perhaps dinner will be a nice Caprese salad.... I'll need to go to whole foods for tomato and basil.......